Thursday, August 25, 2005

Wedding Tears

I attended a friend’s wedding last week, a wedding so close to my heart because the bride is special to me. Patty and I have been friends since college. I witnessed how her relationship with Nino bloomed from acquaintance, to friends, to special friends, up to more-than-friends.

I gleamed with pride as I saw her outline behind the stained-glass sliding door. My heart skipped a beat when the doors were slowly opened. Patty looked so radiant, as the sun glistened over her white sequined gown. As she walked along the aisle, I cannot contain myself. I never expected to cry.

Tears of joy. Back in our college days, we shared the same dreams of someday marrying the love of our lives, and having a beautiful wedding. In fact, we made a dummy of our respective dream wedding invitations. The whole line up of entourage was complete, except for the groom’s name. Funny how it may seem, but I remember the days when we used to ask each other if there is anything is wrong with us, why we do not have any boyfriend nor even a suitor for that matter? Watching her in her gown as she walked there in the aisle moved me. This is the realization of her dreams. No, much better when we tried to picture it out before. Part of my tear cried for happiness.

Tears of sadness. From hereon, things will change. Once they build their family, her priorities will change. She won’t be as free as she used to be. She will not be that available for a girl’s night out. I felt I lost a friend. Part of my tear cried for this selfish reason.

Tears of fear. Watching Patty as she wedded Nino, made me realize that I have come to this “stage” already. This is my third wedding for the year, and my third wedding reception emcee as well. (I have even memorized the process of the reception already). A realization struck me. My peers are getting married. It is just so glaring this time, because I spent more of my growing up years with Patty, and the comparison so apparent. Where am I? Am I missing the bus already? Part of my tear cried for fear.

Then again, I shook off my internal demons and looked at her. I am much happier than sad or afraid. I am happy because she has married the love of her life. Nino is a good man, and I know he will take good care of her. She is now living her dreams.

As for me, nothing to worry. I am happy still. Every person has his or her own unique story. Mine is different and it will unfold in due time.


Lanee Girl said...

being an emcee in 3 weddings is a start, hehehe! cge lang gud, time will come na ikaw na jud ang mangita ug emcee for your wedding ;) pana-panahon lang gud ;)