Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Diary of a Broken Heart



Day 1


As soon as the the alarm rang,  I opened my eyes with tears overflowing.  I am officially missing him.  I did not expect for this day to come.  When I first broke up from a previous relationship, I felt like a part of my dearest and closest family member has died.  But this time, I felt a part of me has died.  I want to sulk and stay in bed, but I have to live... I have to survive.


I looked at the window and it was sunny and bright outside.  How dare do the sky turn up to be sun-shiney?    Doesn't it know that it is gloomy and stormy inside my  heart?  

Day 2

I still cannot accept what just have happened.  I am not telling anyone, just in case we might get back together again.  This way, no explanations would be needed.  In fact, I changed my facebook profile picture, into a picture of me and him.  I am living in a secret dream world, because right now, it is the best place in the world.  And nobody knows.

Yes nobody knows.... Except my next door neighbor.  Thanks to this modern studio-unit-construction, my neighbor heard my cries and sobs.  As I drenched myself in my pool of tears, she knocked on my door and gave me a glass of water, a box of tissue, and a concoction of aroma therapy blend.  How sweet of her.  We are not the best of pals, and we just normally exchange a couple of cordial greetings to each other.  But this time, I hugged her.  Feels nice and comforting to have a hug.

Day 3

I can now conclude that heart break is the best weight loss program.  Lost two pounds in two days already.  As much as I want to take care of myself and feed myself, I fail.  The sight of food makes me want to vomit.  After a sip or two with my coffee, I feel full already. 

I went for groceries to buy myself all feel good foodies I can find.  But a few feet inside the supermarket has sent me to tears.  One of our sweet bonding moments has been cooking.  And every time I see the usual ingredients we use, brings back memories of him that it sent more tears flowing, even amidst the presence of other shoppers.  I cannot believe how a can of pork and beans or a pack of mushrooms, or a jar of coffee, or a bag of crumpets can make me cry.  

Day 4

I already talked to my mother and sister.  I told them... I had to at least tell someone.  It feels good to unload.  And it feels great to be reminded that no matter what, they are there for me and will always love me.... Mum and sis, cried with me.  

Day 5

Enough of crying!!! Life must go on.  I admit that I continue to pray for him, hoping and wishing for him to come back.  But that's the only thing I can do.   The rest is up to him.

I have learned that relationships is a two-way street.  No matter how hard you try to keep it, if the other wants to let go, all efforts go futile.  

I am mad at him. He said he is willing to fight for me.  I am mad, that he is not strong enough. I am mad because he said he has left, but why is he still in my heart and in my mind?  I am mad at him because I still love him.  My heart is telling me, "fool forget him."  But my heart is saying, "Don't let go."

Day 6

My first weekend without him. At first I was sad because without my work, I have no diversion.  But I realized, it is a golden time to pamper myself.

I took a nice long warm shower, holding a mini concert and singing my heart out with gusto. It felt nice to shout it all out.  I felt energized and happy.

Then, time to unleash my wallet and shop until I drop. I think it is better to cry because I have spent up all my money - shopping, than to cry because of a broken heart.

Then night time came.  I suddenly missed him again.  Need to do something.  I looked at myself in the mirror. Before I knew it I was cutting my own hair, fringe, sides and back.  I thought this only exists in the movies.  But I am surprised how fun and satisfying it can be.  I am afraid that I will regret this on the next day, but for now I don't care.  I am feeling in control.  I am so enjoying it, inch after inch, until I realized I have cut almost four inches off my hair.  Need to stop now, I really do... I must hide the scissors now.

Day 7

I was afraid to look at myself in the mirror... I fear I might regret the shearing frenzy I had the night before... Might need to go to the salon for some repairs.

And when I finally got the courage to confront myself in the mirror, I was surprised.  What a sight! "My, hello there you pretty young thing!" 

Hmmm.. I actually look fine, and my hair is kinda behaving properly to the new cut.  I was happy. I felt like, if I can take care of my hair, I can take care of my life. I decided not to go to the salon.  This is my masterpiece and I would not want anyone to fiddle with my work.  

And now, time for me to go to church... Time for me to pray, plead, and ask for God to take care of him... And if it is part if His will, for Him to bring my munchkin back to me... At the same time, for me to have the courage to step out of my dream world and enjoy the sunshine and the blooming flowers of spring.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Twisted Reality

Let me tell you of a sad, sad reality... I am actually living in a fantasy world, where he is mine and I am his.  Yes, this is a sad and secret reality.  

I haven't told my friends, haven't changed my status in facebook.  In fact, I even changed my profile pic with a picture of Munchkin and me, back in our happier days.  I have not told them, and still no plans in telling them.  As I am not yet ready to face the world.  I just cannot believe it is over.  I thought that time for us would last a lifetime. But only to realize that it was only for a borrowed period of time. 

When I asked him if he was prepared to lose me, his replied that he was prepared to fight for me.  Spoken like a true knight in shining armor.  However, somewhere along the fight, something went amiss.  I know he tried his best.  But I guess he got all too bruised and worn. tired and frustrated, he must have felt this is a battle he does not want fight anymore.  

It is complicated.

And although we parted ways and bid each other goodbye, deep inside I still cannot let go.  My mind tells me, "Fool, forget him."  But my heart is saying, "Don't let go.  Hold on until the end."  Mind versus heart.  And the heart is winning by a far stretch.

How I wish I can rewind time, back in the days when we still have each other.  Or somehow fast forward to the future, in the hopes of having him there.   The present reality is such a nightmare.  And so now I live in my dreams, where the reality of our love still exists, fresh and alive.

I am praying, hoping and asking God that after this respite, my Munchkin will come back like a true knight in shining armor and fight the ugly reality, then kiss me and make my dreams come true.

And as I wait, I lay my head to sleep and to dream.  Good night and sweet dreams to me.

Parting



"If I knew that today would be the last time I’d see you, 

I would hug you tight and pray the Lord be the keeper of your soul.


If I knew that this would be the last time you pass through this door, 
I’d embrace you, kiss you, and call you back for one more.


If I knew that this would be the last time I would hear your voice, 
I’d take hold of each word to be able to hear it over and over again.



If I knew that this would be the last time I see you,
I'd tell you I love, and would not just assume foolishly that you know it already.



                                                                 -Gabriel Garcia Marquez

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Love's Poet


My Munchkin is the most rational and logical person I have ever met.  However, despite the logical wiring of his brain, he does not fall short in showering me with sweet emotional affections and speak along the wavelengths of my love language.  At a touch of love, my Munchkin transforms into the sweetest poet in the world:

1) While we were still at earlier part of our relationship, we were having coffee and someone sent him a call ...

Me: Why won't you answer the phone?

Munchkin: I am with you right now, so which means that cannot be important.  It can wait.

Me: Mmmmm... Who could it be?  Must be another girl. Hehehe (teasing him)

Munchkin: I only have two women in my life right now.  And that is you and my mother.

2) After having a bad day at work, I was pouring out to him my sentiments ...

Me: ... Hey, sorry for unloading my worries and concerns to you.  

Munchkin:  No, don't be sorry.  That's what I am here for.

3) When I went to his house one Friday night after work, as I opened the door ...

Me: Hmmmm! Smells good!

Munchkin:  I am preparing a nice meal for my princess, so that as soon as she opens the door, she can smell it.

4) While window shopping at a home storage solution store, I was gushing over the dressing room and storage solution set...

Me:  Oh.. I like this!!! It is my dream to have a dressing room or at least a walk-in closet.

Munchkin:  Someday, I will make that dream come true for you.

5) While we were having dinner...

Me: Where do you see yourself retiring?  Australia or UK?

Munchkin:  I still don't know... Who knows, Philippines might be a good option.

6) While watching Gossip Girl ...

Me:  Baby, who do you think is more beautiful?  Blair or Serena?

Munchkin:  They are all right, but not as beautiful as you.

7) When he was deciding whether or not stay in Australia or go back to UK ...

Me: You decide on what's best for you.  Do not worry about me here.  I want what's best for you.

Munchkin:  You are the best for me.

8) While we were having a major life-altering situation ...

Me:  Are you prepared to lose me?

Munchkin:  I am prepared to fight for you.

Monday, September 20, 2010

On Leadership


There is an on going debate whether leaders are born or made.  I am not pretty sure if which one is right.  But one thing I can say, I love to lead.   Ever since I was a kid, while doing role playing, I would take on the role of a teacher, the boss or the mother.  And when I went to school, I have been pretty active taking not only leadership roles in classroom works, but including various extra curricular activities as well. It is not because I like to take charge and take control of things.  But because I like create an impact and more so, create positive influence.

And when my sister asked my help on her assignment, I was deeply touched.  Her assignment was to interview her leadership mentor... And she chose to interview me.  Deep inside, I felt a sense of pride.  Of all the people I want to create the most positive influence on, that would be with my sister.  

So, here's how our interview went:


1)  How did you get started in the industry?

I am now currently working in a law firm as a Senior Secretary. And previous to this, I was with a multinational company working in various departments in Sales, Marketing and Human Resources.  As you can see in my now 10 years of career life, I am exposed to a wide range of fields.  

My career In both my legal and corporate indusctries, it was not an intentional pursuit to be in this position, as I have no background in both areas.  I graduated with a major in Journalism.  But I had an open mind.  I made myself flexible and versatile as much as possible by trying opportunities outside my box, pushing beyond my perceived limits and exploring something new.  

When  I applied for both positions, to me, there was a tiny chance of getting in . But there's no harm in trying.  And I'm glad I tried because the doors of opportunity were opened for me.  

2) What are the highs and lows of your career? How did you deal with lows of your career?

The highs in my career is seeing people under my care learn, grow and develop.  More than achieving 101% target achievement, I feel far greater satisfaction in seeing people under my care learn, grow and develop.  And the pay off is more long lasting.  To see them get promoted, being able to progress in their life, buy a car, buy a house, makes me happy.  Until now I keep close connections with some of them and they update me with their achievements.  And modesty aside, they thank me for the training I imparted on them. Not that I expect that they would, but when they do, it makes me glad and fully satisfied.

My lowest point in my career came at the highest point of my position.  The saying that goes it is lonely on the top is true.  Being in the middle management, you sometimes have to make a stern decision, sometimes a decision you do not want to make because it might affect the comforts of other people.  But you have to do it for the greater good of the company.  Therefore people begin to misinterpret good intentions and somehow cordial friendships turn sour.

At first, it was hard.  I admit I cried some tears when I was alone in my room.  But over time I have learned not to take things personally.  I tell myself that I am paid to do my job, get the results and not to make friends comfortable.  I also learned to act tough and unshaken, but little do they know that deep inside I am quivering.  Sometimes, it is all about image and projection.  But once I know what I am doing and as long as it is within the company's mission, vision and values, I am confident in carrying out my decisions.  Sometimes hard decisions must be made.  That is part of a management principle, and that is what separates a leader from a follower.

3)   What achievements are the most memorable to you?

Like I said, it is in people development.  There are a couple of applicants that I had to vouch and fight for to my superiors.  At the onset my superiors saw no value of them, but to me I see them as a diamond on a rough.  So I had to convince them to take in this person because I see the potential.  Once my superiors agreed, I trained them and now they are doing well in their respective careers promoted in the head office and some of them are now assistant managers.  From a warehouse man to assistant manager; from distributor salesman to assistant manager; from an agency coordinator to assistant manager... the list is endless.... 

4) Who do you consider as your mentors?

Wherever I go, I try to collect nuggets of learnings from each bosses that I had.  I work with them and learn as much as I can.  Even from the bad bosses, I learn what not to do.

I also consider John Maxwell and Stephen Covey as my mentors, as I read and study their books.

Last but not the least, my mother.  Ever since I was young she has exposed me to different fields of interest.   

5)  What are the most important things you learned from him/her?

From my bosses, operational stuff, what to do in the processes.  Also how to deal with people.  From John Maxwell and Stephen Covey it is all about the essence of leadership, more than management.  From my mom, this constant hunger for learning and passion for excellence.

6)  What are the qualities did you emulate from your mentors?

Summarized on two words:People Development.

7) Did you ever see yourself in the position where you’re at right now?

No. Actually not.  Looking back, when I was younger I wished to be a plain simple housewife, married to an Expat. Hahahaha! So far from it.  Quite opposite.  

8)  How would you define leadership?

Leadership is all about influence.  It is not measured by how many people reporting to you, but how many leaders you have developed.  

9) Have you ever thought of yourself as a leader?


Yes.  I love to lead.  Ever since I was a kid I have always been a leader.  Even when we were playing games with my friends, I would always take on the role of a mother, a teacher, or a boss. 

10)  What qualities do you think are important in becoming a leader?

A leader needs to have a vision and can inspire and influence others to carry out that vision.  A leader must also know the team, looking at them not as mere employess, but as indivisuals, as a person.  A leader must learn how to teach, coach and mentor.  A leader must likewise know to enforce discipline, should for such arise.  A leader must know how to motivate the team.  And lastly, a leader must know how to communicate well with the team and other stakeholders.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Love is Love










The language of love has many dialects.  It is expressed in various ways. Let me count the ways...

Love is watching my favorite TV series, Gossip Girl, with my Munchkin while he groans and comments against the characters, nitpicking on their flaws and telling me that I am prettier than Blair or Serena, until he drifts off to sleep.

Love is eating rocky road ice cream with my Munchkin and setting aside all the almonds for me to eat.  Not because he doesn't like almonds (in fact he likes almonds) but because I love almonds.

Love is smiling and posing at the camera to take our snapshots, even if my Munchkin does not want to be photographed.  Munchkin's mum calls it a forced smile.  But I think he looks all handsome to me.

Love is turning the heating on to a full volume because I am shivering, even if my Munchkin feels like it is "hotter than the sun".

Love is patiently listening to my concerns and woes about my work, my day, my life.  Always there to lend his ear and give his strong arms to lean on.

Love is patiently trying to answer my endless and sometimes crazy and outrageous rhetorical questions. My Munchkin pausing for a moment to think, then sigh, then answer them the best way he could.

Love is listening and absorbing our conversations, to the point of remembering the tiniest and even most trivial facts that I never expect my munchkin would remember.  Because it means, he is giving me his utmost attention - even the the words not spoken.

Love is telling me I am beautiful, even when I am stressed and undone.

Love is going to church with me.

Love is loving me and treating me like a princess.

All these and more.  Even the tiniest thing can speak volumes on love's expression.  Because little things don't mean a lot.  They mean everything.

Sunday, August 08, 2010

Lessons on The Subject on Men


I am no relationship guru, nor am I an expert in men.  Combining both reminds me of a lesson in chemistry - complex compound.  And yet it is in their complexity that which makes both more interesting. As how physics would describe them, both radiate gravitational enigma.  

To borrow the english lesson on figures of speech, its simile is irony.  And even if like algebra, the variables are vast, I have come to conclude some basic truth about about men and relationships.  These bullet facts are based from  the chronicles of my learnings in history with and a couple of basic lessons on logic and derivation with all the men I know - boyfriend, ex-boyfriends, male friends, relatives, officemates,  famous personalities, etc.

Here are some basic lessons and facts about men that I always keep in mind.  Some ideas may not be originally mine, some may even sound cliche, but these are the basic, tried and tested truths and principles that I have personally experienced over time:

1. If a man loves you, nothing can stop him from spending time with you.  He will find a way, not matter how inconvenient it is for him.

2. If a man is not interested with you, nothing can stop him from avoiding you.  He can give you a thousand and one excuses why he can't.

3.  You know when a man is serious with you - that is when he plans his future and you are included in that plan.

4. When a man has a problem, he normally likes to process things on his own.  It is not that he is shutting you away, he just needs time to think on his own.  

5.  The more you run after a man, the more he runs away.

6. Never give the man the power to affect the way how you think and feel about yourself.

7. Men secretly crave for appreciation.  They like to know that they know how to please their mate. Learn to appreciate even the littlest and simplest thing.  Most often, for men, the words "thank you" is more impactful than "I love you." 

8. Unless stated, never assume.  Just because he is inviting you out for lunches, dinners or coffee, it does not necessarily mean that he is willing to commit in a serious relationship with you.  Sometimes, they just want to be in company with a beautiful girl.  Period.  So, never assume unless stated.

9.  When a man remembers the smallest details of your conversations, like trivial facts about you and your stories, you know that he is deeply interested in you.  Because more often than not, they forget.  Lest, even pay attention to obvious details.  So if he remembers, girlfriend be flattered.  And hey, that's another brownie point for him to get the appreciation he deserves.

10.  Men and women have different love language.  Do not expect to be loved in your own terms.  Learn to read his language, this way you will be able to feel his love for you.  
So far, the list ends here.  I am still in the process of learning.  And now, being in a relationship, makes the subject matter more interesting.  I now have my personal tutor who can help me learn more.   I look forward to learning the next few chapters in this lesson with my munchkin!


So that's all about it for now.  Class dismissed... Study hard, because who knows, someday you might have a pop quiz!

Saturday, July 31, 2010

My Love, My Munchkin, My Man

If you have a wonderful man, who is not perfect, but is perfect for you, who works hard and would do anything for you, who makes you laugh and is your best friend, whom you want to grow old with, who is your world and someone you are thankful for every night ... 
Then you know exactly what I feel. :) 

Thursday, July 29, 2010

New Look




After quite a long furlough in my Pink Patio, I noticed cobwebs glistening all over the place.  So now not only have I decided to shoo away the dirt, dust and cobwebs, I have decided to give it a makeover. 


Time for some upgrade.  It took me weeks to configure how.  And thanks to Gis & Birdie's help, Pink Patio is sparkingly "new" and pretty!


Enjoy the renovated look of Pink Patio.  New design but still the same heart, the same soul, the same me... only better, wiser, stronger me... Pink Patio Princess. XOXO



Monday, July 26, 2010

6 Monthsary


Tomorrow marks the 6th monthsary of my great outback adventure, here in the land down under. And so far, it has been a journey of surprises and unexpected twists.

Before coming here, I had a rosy picture of living a life in a foreign country. But I forgot roses have thorns too.  The global financial crisis has made the job search like diving for precious pearls.  I applied for all sorts of jobs from sales, marketing, human resources, administration, and even went far outside the box of trying my luck in coffee shops, cleaning jobs, factory assembly line and nearly babysitting jobs.  

Modesty aside, I am an accomplished person and I have achieved a lot in life.  But the job hunting experience was a truly humbling exercise.  I felt back to ground zero. All my accomplishments amounted to nothing, as if they never existed.  I cannot land a job even for the lowest grade, no brainer position.

And just when I was about to give up the hunt and start considering packing my bags homeward-bound, an opportunity was opened for me to work as a legal secretary in a law firm.  I have no background in law, much more in a foreign land!  But when opportunity knocks, you got to pounce on it.  And pounce on it I did.  Never in my wildest dreams did I consider working for a law firm, but here I am right now.  Pretty in pink, feeling "legally blonde".

Another surprise is my changed lifestyle.  I can now leave work by 5:30pm. Hurray!!! I then expected to have more time to attend to my hobbies, blogging included.  But then again, I was proven wrong.  Never did I realize how my domestic chores would increase twofolds.  Cost of living is higher than my home country.  Thus, I am forced to do my own laundry, ironing and cooking.  And surprisingly leaving me no enough time to blog when I am home.  I barely can sit and do nothing.  There is always a chore that needs to be done.

Yes, I am now living a simple life.  I am forcibly cured from my shop-aholism.  Before, I can buy whatever my heart and eyes desire.  Now, I contend to window shopping and when I say contend, I mean literally feeling contented looking at the pretty displays.  Oh, how I loved to shop before.  But now, I feel no appetite for it.  No more shoes of different colors.  No more coordinating bags and belt to match it.  Simple.  Me.

But the biggest surprise came when I met my munchkin.  Never thought the old cliche of love coming at the most unexpected time would apply to me, not at this time.  When I landed here, I was gung-ho in settling myself and finding a job.  Man hunting was least in my priority.  But the irony of love truly comes at the most unexpected time, even when you feel no need of it, and no matter how cliche it sounds - its truth cannot be denied. Tried and Tested.  


Now, the lovelorn damsel is lonely no more.  I am happy and so much in love. I am pampered and treated like a princess by my munchkin.  How sweet indeed to love and be loved.  He puts a song in my heart.  And despite the coldest days, I feel comfort in the warmth of his embrace.  Yes, that is my sweet sugar munchkin. He, who has made my dark lonely nights into ancient history.  No matter what crap the day throws at me, my munchkin manages to make up for it with his simple little ways and his small sweet surprises.

Happy six months to me.  Looking back, when I was desperately scrambling for survival, I never expected to stay longer, lest reach six months.  But now I have! Wow, home is now slowly sounding ages and miles away.  

Lord, thank you for everything.  And even if things did not fall according to what I expected, You managed to surprise me according to Your great plan and Your timelines. I know things happen for a reason.  Let me see things according to Your perspective.  To move on despite adversities; To persevere in trying times; To appreciate the small blessings and sweet surprises that come to me at the most unexpected time, and even in the most unexpected packaging.  Please continue to be with me.  Lead me to a better and sweeter journey ahead of me as I move forward.  And best of all,  let me hold my munchkin's hand until the sunset of our lives.




Thursday, March 25, 2010

The Great Outback Adventure


Almost two months here in South Australia since I uprooted myself from my mother-land. And what great adventure it has been!

NOSE BLEED

Back home, we have a term that we call, "nose bleed", and it pertains to something that is quite challenging to understand. Being a newbie in a foreign land, almost everything brings me to the point of nosebleed - Aussie accent, local jargons and terminologies, car and directional orientation (left hand drive vs right hand drive), deciphering the bus timetable, government policies, etc... I am not complaining. It is but normal. I am trying to embrace the new environment. I need some re-wiring. I have to unlearn some of my old ways, and learn the new ways in my new home.

FAMILY and FRIENDS

I miss my family and friends back home. I miss them everyday. But instead of viewing it as losing them, I look at it as making more of them - here. My transfer here does not mean cutting of my ties with them, but it means having more avenues to build new ones. People here are warm, friendly, accommodating and helpful. I have met some few Filipino group, who reminds me of a glimpse back home whenever I am with them.

I got some few housemates as well - coming from different parts of the world. Together, we can build the United Nations meeting. But despite our dynamic background, we gel well. Primarily because all of us share similar temperament. We are cool, quite, calm, and peace-loving. We share similar interest - photographs, food and surprise birthday treats. :)

But the big winner in my best friend list is Google Map. Google Map has been my faithful companion in helping me navigate through the streets. I am normally very poor in directions and navigation. But now, I am left with no choice. I cannot imagine how I would survive the Adelaide city streets and suburbs with out my handy dandy friend.

HIGH HOE, HIGH HOE

When I voluntarily left my high-profile job in a multi-national company of nine years, I have become part of the statistics of the unemployed. I figured that finding job and starting anew will not be a walk in the park. But I did not expect it to be this hard. Customizing my CV, writing tons of cover letters - makes me feel like I am fresh from college again.

I have been applying for all sorts of job - anything and everything under the sun. The agonizing pain of receiving one rejection letter from the other. Sometimes it makes me doubt if I am unqualified for any position - even a cleaner's job - in Australia? ... I have the qualifications, credentials, the skills and the attitude but it feels like it does not hold any merit here at all. I have met some few skilled migrants as well, and they too experience the same thing. So it is not about me... it must be system. But we cannot complain. At least, I cannot complain. I came here out of my free will to leave the luxuries I had and move here in quest of a greater quality of life.... And this part of the adventure package.

They say it takes an average of at least three years for migrants to stabilize in a new surrounding. I am only on my second month. I should not be hard on myself... This is just a start-up hiccup. I am looking forward to the long-term pay-off. I do not know when it will come, I do not know in what form either, but I try to keep the faith and stay positive. It will do me nothing if I keep on worrying.

And wile I wait for my big break to come, I work part time in some project based assignments here and there. Currently, I work as a part-time barista in a small coffee shop. it is a humbling experience - very far from what I am used to. It is very physical but with less mental exercise. I had to develop amnesia. I had to forget my work, my title, and my position back home - for me to stand straight and embrace the job. Looking at the bright side, at least it comes with lesser responsibilities and lesser stress. Plus, the physical movements has enabled me to exercise and loose more weight. Hello to a sexier me! (Whitweew!)

SURPRISE, SURPRISE

I find it amusing, just when you were looking for something else, another thing comes knocking on your door. You try to avoid it because it is not your "priority", but slowly gravity works its way to bring you close, much closer. I wanted to establish a career first, before finding love. But I think the opposite is happening. I still am not sure if this is the love story I am waiting for. I am waiting for the next chapters to unfold. And while I do, I keep an open mind, and an open heart.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

A Love Story Waiting to Unfold

Ok, so today is valentine's day. Big deal. It's just a day capitalized by chocolate companies, florists, and greeting card makers. Not so bitter am I? .... Actually, no. Because for me, everyday is valentine's day. Everyday brings me a day closer until my love story will unfold. I do not know when that time will come, but I try my best to be ready.

And yeah, since today is valentine's day, in celebration with the season, here's a prose I wrote not so long ago...


Another day has come
I go out to meet the sun.
I ask to myself, "Will this be the day?"

All my life, I have been waiting.
Embraced by loneliness and doubt,
I go out to find my bliss.
I searched the mountains and the valleys
I flowed through the rivers and the tide.

Until I found a cute little frog.
Along the shore with glee,
I skipped and I hopped with frog prince.
Up and down the rainbows we ran.
The world so colorful and bright.
I did not notice the clouds turning gray.
Come rain, come shine,
Frog prince and I, weaving a beautiful love story.
Our love is a perfect blend,
Nothing can break through the fabric of our love.

Then one fine day,
A butterfly came along our way.
Frog prince ran to chase the butterfly,
Never to come back.

Another day has come,
I got out to meet the sun.
I ask to myself, "Will this be the day?"

I waited for him to come back.
Embraced by loneliness and doubt
I drowned my pillows with tears.
I searched the mountains and the valleys,
I filled the rivers and the tide.

Until I found the love of God.
Along the shore in tears,
I sobbed and hounded to my God.
Up and down the throes of my emotions,
The radiance of God's love shines the brightest.
Coming down on my knees
I asked God to write me a beautiful love story.
For His will is good, pleasing and perfect.
Nothing can go better than God's best.

I am excited for that one fine day,
For my beloved true prince to come my way.
He runs swiftly to me,
Never to part.

Another day has come,
I go out to meet the Son,
I say to myself, "To this very day, God is writing
A beautiful love story for me."